Spiral of Silence

 She's always on point, most of her peers are envious of her. Everyday, she goes to Dubai, on some occasion, she's in France but not alone always with him. He is someone's joy, pride and everything but he belongs to her.

Why am I suffering so much while Ella has it all. Maybe I have been cursed for nothing, so unlucky lamented Sarah.

If only Sarah and  others knew the in- depth analysis of Ella's pains and agonies behind her shining face and glittering white tooth. If only they  she knew that she has stolen someone's joy yet she's not joyous. If only they knew how Ella is envious of them. She has sold her freedom and dignity to him, he own her completely. Such is life. She has never broken silence so one knew what she's going through.

Today, people are envious of others without knowing their source of income, their personal life style, relationships, as well as knew the challenges and pains they go through unspoken. Why the low self-esteem? 

Low self-esteem can discourage you from attaining success. This makes you wallow in silence and your creative ideas ignored intrinsically.  No need for spiral of Silence be free to express yourself even when you are not on track, be confident and bold.

HOW TO OVERCOME SPIRAL OF SILENCE

In order to overcome low self-esteem and spiral of silence; 

* Place more value on you life. 

* Determine to do something great because    you are a great personality with great and brighter potential hidden within you that you need to explore. 

*Love yourself before you can love someone     else 

* Envy no one rather than yourself and be contended with what you have.

* Have a positive thinking mentality, avoid negative thoughts.

* Choose your friends don't let friends chose you to astray.

* Sometimes, most things  are not necessarily good for you, be conscious.

* Don't allow active voices to put you in silence, be brave and of good courage.

Never Regret your Past : It's a Lesson

 Past is simply a time that has gone by while regret is a remorseful feeling of inadequacies or shortfalls.

The past has gone by, why worry about it. There are so many things you must have wished time could permit you to take charge of right now. It's really not necessary any more. Never think hard about the past because it brings more pains, fears and regrets.

 Don't cry over the past, it's gone. Nothing in this life is permanent, so don't stress yourself too much about anything because no matter how bad the situation you are facing right now is, it will certainly change.

I regret nothing in my life even if my past was full of hurt, I see everything as a learning process for my life. Maybe your trials are tougher than mine, no need to worry, life itself is in different dimensions so is our problems but the most important thing is our ability to overcome it all. This is why Henry Ford said that failure is an opportunity to start more intelligently.

It could be your relationship, marriage, career, job, business, education, family and the list goes on, that must have faced one challenge or the other, you don't have to regret it. It is in the past now, all you need to do is keep on moving forward because no amount of regrets can make a river cry.

Always fill your life with happiness and love. Life is beautiful, if you miss any beautiful moment out of it, you can't retrieve it so avoid sadness, anger,regrets and live life to the fullest.

Life trials will test and shape you but don't let them change who you are......

 

Sexual Compatibility

 Sexual compatibility is the degree to which partners perceives they share similar or same sexual beliefs, needs and desires as well as being on the same page. However, being sexually compatible with someone doesn't mean having amazing sex all the time. In essence, sexual compatibility as it were, is all about being able to interact or communicate with your partner about everything.

Today, women feel comfortable and are able to tell men when they truly want sex. They are able to say 'yes' without shame and 'no' without any form of guilt when a man suggests that he want sex.

                                 appadvice.com

Most men today uses the idea of sex to prove if a woman loves them or not. Sex has become the determinant for love. They would sound like,' if you truly love me you will have sex with me to seal our love unless you don't love me'. This simply proves that the man doesn't love you but wants to use your body for fun.

With this consciousness, as a woman, you don't need to be scared of loosing such a man. He is not meant for you. In the end you will me meet someone who will is not willing to change anything in you but to love you just the way you are.

Yes, sex can happen on the very first you meet an attractive individual but mutual respect for each order is a necessity as this can lead to a pleasurable sexuality other than being compelled into it.

There is no need for emotional and sexual exploitation. Instead let love and sex be based on personal sexual responsibility in which the needs and desires of each people in relationship are accepted wholeheartedly.

Let there be sexual compatibility. This is because sex is a basic instinct that needs to be enjoyed by both men and women.

Be Yourself

 No one can be you than yourself. No matter what always be your true self. No one is smarter than you and no one is better than you. Just because someone is doing better than you doesn't mean that he / she is better than you.

Just be yourself, ife is too short to be someone else. Life is how you live it. Always believe in yourself.

No one can be you than yourself. Always remember the law of potential difference. You are well equipped with you own potentials so is another. No one should make you feel inferior. You have the ability to be greater than anyone, if only you can possess the possibility right frame of mine. Anything is possible to him that believe.

Whenever you feel like giving up, think of those wishing for just one chance to amend their lives. There are so many shattered plans, lives, destinies and purposes of so many persons all over the world, but you are different, don't you think you need to be grateful for who you are. This is because your current status is someone else's prayer point.

Shattered Love

Frankly speaking, I have heard from people who speaks about their various relationships' and love life but non has struck me more negatively like that of 'Gifted Brown'. Her luck with love was quite extraordinary. And it began quite early.

According to her, she was with him, her very first love who deflowered her in early July, 2019 after being with him in a relationship for 3 years. Distance they say was a barrier to many distance relationships but love could have been a connection for any distance relationship. Maybe, it might be for others but not in Gifted Brown's case. She was engrossed in her love for him that she never realized that the relationship was a one sided affair. What became an eye opener was also responsible for her pains. Yes, men play games a lot but is it really necessary? How come what brings smiles on our faces within a second can as well reflect frowns on our faces and caused pains in our inner being.


So many persons have made life miserable for the brave at heart who took the bull of love with pleasure. In the case of Gifted, her bravery was shattered, pains and tears became her diet. Could she be dreaming. It was clear to her then that 3 years was not 3 days. Three years of turning other men down for one man was gone. He was a jerk after all. So many questions unattended to, she sometimes questions her integrity and existence. Was he patient with her for the past 3 years just to go through her paradise or could she have been patient enough to obey the Holy Book that goes against sex before marriage ( formication). What could be wrong, she wondered.


 He never broke up with her formally but after having her the relationship was over. Months later, she realized that she was pregnant after going through series of stress both emotional, she lost the baby but still grateful for life. Despite having knowledge of these events in Gifted's life, he never showed kindness neither was he remorseful of his actions. To him, it was over long ago but another have to bore the mark of remembrance. Can weak people stop trading love for sex. Being weak in loving others is OK, but influencing others with your weakness is devilish and inessential. Could there be a time in this our generation where good people will not be deceived and hurt by the bad ones? I guess, not yet.


 I was seized by her story and I found myself totally ensconced in it. It could happen to anyone, either me or you. How can someone go through such agony for the sake of love. What a ' shattered love' it was, but more profoundly, Gifted Brown still remains an extraordinary individual with great potential. One thing I learnt from her story is that family will always be family. In it all, they stood by her, this act alone I believe will strengthen and quicken her inner being to realize and embrace her potentials.

Love is Funny

Everything about life and love is funny. Most times, the ones we care for don't care less. Very funny indeed!!!


 When you are the only one feeling love and care for someone without the other paying attention to you, just know that the attention is somewhere else. Don't waste your time and effort loving. Isn't it funny that the ones we love, loves another. Indeed love is actually blind but true love is adorable but scarce, unless it's waves is blown to your direction.

I remembered a friend telling me about her love story. According to her, she fell in love with her boyfriend not knowing that she was drawing. He doesn't even make her any of his priority. He hardly calls,she has no choice than to call him. After having sex with her nothing else matters. It took her three years to realize how funny love can be.

Could love be this funny?.... Actually it could be. This is because most attributes that constitute in loving someone are lacking in our attitudes. There's no room for tolerance, endurance, forgiveness nor mercy. That's why most people believe love is for the strong hearted and brave ones. If so, what then is Love?.....

However, I advice  my friend never to regret any of her past actions. This is because they help to strengthened and encourage her to become a better person. All her hurts actually thought her a lot in life.

Before you say "I Do"

Most persons, mostly the ladies feels the best achievement in life after acquiring education is "marriage". Everyone wants to get married by all means without adequate preparation.  

Before you say I do, there are few questions that you need to ask yourself ;

 * How prepared are you for marriage?

 * Are you ready to face some
      unforeseen circumstances
                     in marriage?

 * Are you aware that marriage is
               a life -  time journey?

 * How prepared are you to make
               sacrifices  in your
                     marriage?

 * Do you know that there's no
            babysitting attitudes
                   in marriage?

 * Are you ready to enjoy the good times                      and endure the bad times
                        in marriage?

* Are you getting married because
         you're ready for it or is it
            because all your friends
               are getting married?

 *  Are you really prepared to do it?

 * Hope you know that divorce is improper                          and not an option?

 Marriage is full of surprises, not all that glitter is actually gold, hope you know this!!

 While making adequate plans for your wedding don't forget to prepare for your marriage. Don't be carried away in marriage fantasy rather be zealous towards one another and also, create room for little things. This makes a big difference in our hearts. I know it sounds reminiscent because we take each other for granted. Make your spouse feels that they are truly treasured, this can add more spices to you marriage.

Before you say "I Do", be sure that you and your spouse are meant for each other, let the union be genuine. Don't rush into marriage because of family, friends or life's  challenging situations. Be sure is what you're ready for .